I apologize ahead of time for writing in red. I guess it kinda matches my mood, along with black. I have been reading a lot of your blogs and I am so happy for all of you!! I know the strength and courage that it takes to change our diets to become healthy, happy people and sometimes, I ask myself if it's really worth it!! I mean, whats it really going to hurt by eating that double cheeseburger and french fries, anyway? Is anyone besides me really going to know? No, not unless I tell them, right? But, it will hurt, every single day that I add those pounds on, not just physically, but emotionally as well. I eat when I get stressed and even when I'm sad. It's not the fact that I'm eating, It's WHAT I am eating. Michael has been trying to help more and more, like not asking to go out for pizza and stuff, but I know it's not easy on him, either. He doesn't like veggies and likes all the stuff I can't eat! It's so damn frustrating, and I just want to give up! My true friends tell me that they can definitely see a difference in the few pounds I've lost, but I just don't see it. That upsets me and makes me want to go eat something terrible! I just don't know what to do anymore! I got on the scale a day early and of course it wasn't kind. It's my fault, ENTIRELY, but I keep eating the crap I shouldn't be! I think since I've started WW, I've had ONE WEEK of staying entirely on track! That's 4 months of cheating! I just don't know what to do, how to help myself to stop cheating! I don't excercise, either. I mean, I look at my Gazelle every day and think, Yup, gotta get on it! Yeah, I'll do that later. And, later never happens!
Well, I go to the doctor next Wednesday and I've lost just about 20 lbs since my visit in March. I'm sure she'll be happy for me, but I'm not sure I really care.